ASK FIRST, BEFORE YOU ACCUSE!

I saw a woman in a live TV show apologizing to her boyfriend for having wrongly accused him of chatting with another girl. It turned out the guy was chatting to his mom.

I said to myself this should be a good reminder to all of us.

Before you accuse your lover of anything towards another guy or girl, ASK FOR AND LISTEN TO THE EXPLANATION FIRST.

Unreasonable jealousy and distrust can KILL A RELATIONSHIP.

Ask for a detailed explanation if you want to. It’s your right. You’re the partner, the lover.

The logic and the manner by which the explanation is delivered can tell you if it’s a lie or not. If it defies logic, or if your lover can’t talk straight while looking at you straight in the eye, then he or she is lying.  

Here are the most common roots of jealousy:

Another man or woman – Ask first who the other person is and why must your lover meet him or her. DON’T MAKE ANY ACCUSATIONS unless you see something incriminating for yourself, like extra-ordinary sweetness or they’re French-kissing or heading towards the nearest motel.

If the issue is related to his or her work, try to find out what you want from your friends among your lover’s co-workers. Better yet, from the boss if you can.

Delay in arriving home or for your date, or answering your call or text message – Think of all the possible reasons first like traffic or work load before you jump into conclusions.

Gifts from other people – It could be a token of appreciation for a favor your lover had done, or for his or her birthday or other occasions like Christmas.

Or the other person could be a long-time friend whom you’re lover had not mentioned to you before.

I repeat, ask first, and listen.

Nobody wants to be distrusted for no justifiable reason. Anybody would readily go for somebody who trusts him or her, anytime.

If you want your relationship to last, keep that in mind.  30