HE SAYS HIS EX NEEDS HELP BUT ...

Reacting to our blog “Never be insecure about his ex,” a personal friend of mine from Quezon City raised this situation:

Her boyfriend has informed her that he wants to help his former girlfriend solve a problem that he is in a very good position to deal with.

Her questions: Should she allow him? How can she know if he’s telling the truth?

For the first question, I say yes, allow him.

First, it’s solid proof of your trust and love to your boyfriend. Only an insane man would not appreciate that gesture.

Second, in your own little way, you get to help even if indirectly, somebody in distress. You gain a new friend in the former girl and draw yourself a lot closer not only to your boyfriend but most of all, to God.

That’s one of the things the Lord wants from us, remember?

Now, to know if he’s lying, which is also a query of our reader Doreen Coriana of Chicago, Illinois, USA:

First, ask him, eye-to-eye, to take you along when he talks to his former sweetheart about the problem. If he immediately agrees, eye-to-eye, that’s a sign of being honest.

If he vehemently refuses and comes up with all sorts of reasons, he’s lying, through his teeth.

Next, ask ALL THE DETAILS about the problem and how he intends to help. If he readily and casually talks, he’s being honest.

But still, THINK VERY CAREFULLY of the logic or veracity of whatever details he’ll reveal. If you think a friend would know better, don’t hesitate to call for assistance or added information.

If your boyfriend’s story jibes with what you’ve concluded on your own and have found out from friends, then he’s telling the truth.

But if he won’t say anything about what’s up, or has a very thin justification of why him, then he’s lying.

If he refuses to talk by picking on your conscience with the cliché “don’t you trust me,” SOMETHING’S DEFINITELY NOT RIGHT.

Better start thinking hard if he’s still worthy of your love. 30